Understanding Comparison Culture and Its Impact on Your Well-Being
These days, it feels like we’re constantly measuring our lives against everyone else’s. While social media often takes the heat for this, it’s not the only culprit behind these habits. To break free from the comparison trap, it’s important to understand why we do it in the first place. Letting go of this cycle can help you ditch jealousy, feel more content, and boost your overall happiness. So, what exactly is comparison culture, and how can you rise above it? We will tell you all about it and how to tackle it head-on.
What Is Comparison Culture
Comparison culture is the society-wide encouragement to compare oneself to others. It’s extremely toxic, yet we all do it. Chances are, you’ve looked at a friend and gotten jealous over their looks. Or maybe it was because they got an award at a local race. Or maybe it was something else altogether. It can feel like a need to constantly be #1, or at least #1 at something.
Success, Success, Success
Did you ever look at someone and ask yourself, “Why don’t I have a career like his?” Or looked at a woman in the gym, only to ask why you don’t have a figure like hers? Or again, look at other students in school and wonder why you did so poorly compared to them in your test. That’s Comparison Culture working on you. It’s so common to keep tabs on what others are doing that you might not realize it’s a cultural thing.
A Culture Of Envy And Shame
In many cases, Comparison Culture makes us want things just because people hold them in such high esteem. For example, your child might suffer from it because he doesn’t have the “cool sneakers” like the popular kids in class. What’s strange is that you might feel shame for not having something, even though you know you don’t really want it.
Low Self-Esteem As An Outcome
The problem with Comparison Culture is that it makes you feel like it’s never enough. You’re never smart enough, accomplished enough, thin enough, or wealthy enough. There’s always someone ahead of you that’s doing it better. That’s who you end up comparing yourself to. In most cases, it ends with lowered self-esteem. This is why it’s so important to fix this tendency.
Doesn’t Have To Be This Way
The only person we should be competing with or listening to is ourselves. It’s important to remember that. Moreover, it’s crucial to remember that what works for one person won’t be your ideal life. If you don’t believe it, think about what that person had to do for that insane career. Chances are, it’s more than you’d have been willing to give up.
Social Media’s Impact
Much of Comparison Culture hinges on showing the best of a person’s life. In no place is this more noticeable than social media. Everyone looks like a movie star or a successful professional on Instagram and Facebook. When reality hits, the truth is that most of those posts were staged. Life isn’t that glamorous 24/7. We all experience ups and downs.
Remember The Unseen
There is a lot of shiny, glittery stuff online designed to feed into Comparison Culture. Remembering that people don’t post their failures is key. On the very rare chance that you’ll see a failure online, it will likely be for views or begging for money. In other words, those failures are often staged or otherwise extreme. People hide their “oops moments.”
A Culture Of Self-Focus
Believe it or not, there is another way to see things. It’s best to focus on yourself. In other words, your only competitor is YOU. Your goals, priorities, and ideal self should come from your inner voice. What others do or like is not your concern, nor should it ever be. If you feel like you are not doing enough, compare yourself to an old version of yourself and see how far you’ve come!
Healing From Comparison
Being too obsessed with others’ lives can lead to serious confidence issues and insecurity. In fact, it can even cause friendships to fail. The best way to handle the “push to compare” is to address it through therapy, positive self-talk, and a stark refocus on what really matters.
It’s okay to admit that comparing yourself to others hurts you. It’s a common (and toxic) trait that’s deeply ingrained in people.
Should It Be In Education?
Schools are increasingly focused on teaching more than just math and English. They work on soft skills, such as emotional regulation and drug awareness. People are now starting to ask whether bucking the comparison trend should be part of school education. This is also why some people are starting to think we should stop giving grades.
Gen Z Knows
As it turns out, Gen Z might be the start of a culture that questions or even bucks Comparison Culture altogether. Gen Z is one of the most well-adjusted when it comes to their relationships with media and Comparison Culture. It may be time to take a page from their book by talking about the dangers of comparing yourself to others and stopping this unhealthy habit.
Parents Too!
If you’re a Millennial or Gen X parent, you may have memories of your parents comparing you to others. Now is a great time to buck that trend and be the change you want to see in the world. Rather than compare your child to others, praise them for carving out their own unique path in life. Your child has their own wants. Encourage them to follow their heart!
How To Heal
As we’ve seen earlier, comparison culture can affect us in several ways. However, this doesn’t mean we cannot overcome its toxicity. Limiting social media usage is a good way to heal from unhealthy comparisons. Another great tip is to only compare your life to your previous self. Instead of constantly looking at other people who may be in a better place, think of how far you’ve come.
Be The Change You Want To See
Another important factor is that you should avoid feeding into this unhealthy culture. But how? As easy as it sounds, avoid comparisons! Whenever you realize you are comparing yourself to others, try your best to focus your attention on something else. On top of this, if you tend to post often on your social media pages, don’t only share positive days but also be honest about your struggles.
Not All Negative
While there are plenty of negative sides associated with comparison culture, it’s important to point out that it is not always so bad. Comparing our lives to others is sometimes natural and can have positive effects. For instance, it may push you to become healthier and more productive. However, it’s definitely a fine line, so you need to be extra careful!
