Best Ways to Recover from a Toxic Relationship, According To Experts
Getting stuck in a toxic relationship can have a terrible toll on your mental wellbeing. Unfortunately, it’s not only very hard to understand whether you’re partner is abusive, but it’s even harder to break free from the relationship and put an end to it.
However, if you manage to do so, you will finally be able to start your healing journey. Unfortunately, this is a long process that will take time. Yet, with the right tips, you’ll be able to go back to your normal life. Here are a few tips inspired by Psychology Today.
Do Not Make Contact
Once you are out of a toxic relationship, you need to stay away from that person as much as possible. Do not make contact again so you can move on both mentally and physically. If you absolutely have to contact your ex, make sure your interactions are very short and as limited as possible. You do not want to be sucked back into their unhealthy world.
Block Them Completely
The best way to avoid coming in contact with a toxic ex is to block them from your life. Block their phone number, their social media accounts, and their emails. Completely remove them from your life and make it hard for them to contact you and for you to accidentally contact them. Delete that terrible person from your life so that you can move on!
Reconnect with Family and Friends
Just as it is important to block your toxic ex, it is just as important to revive the healthy relationships in your life. Many people are alienated from their friends and family when in a toxic relationship. Now that you are free, it is time to rekindle those healthy, beneficial relationships. It is essential to have a support system and to also remember what it feels like to be in emotionally stable, happy relationships.
Do Not Expect Closure
Many toxic relationships end abruptly, with one person leaving the relationship once they are able. Just keep moving on, and do not expect some grand gesture of closure. Toxic people don’t typically apologize or acknowledge their bad behavior. They may not even think that they acted in a harmful way. However, you know how you feel, and you need to give yourself closure rather than waiting for a toxic person to do it for you.
Write Yourself a Letter
Writing down how you feel about ending the toxic relationship can be very beneficial. You can write down how you felt throughout the relationship and why you decided to end it. You can also write a letter to your toxic ex, telling them all the things you wish you could say if you were face-to-face.
Not only is writing a letter good for your own personal closure, but it is also a good way to remind yourself of your experience. If you ever feel like you want to go back to your toxic ex, you can look at this letter and remember why you left. Do not go back!
Start a Journal
Experts say that journaling may help your brain process your experiences. Consider keeping a journal of your daily feelings to track your moods and how they relate to your previous relationship. However, feel free to write about whatever you want! Just the act of writing things down can be cathartic and healing. Keep in mind that you don’t have to write every day for this method to be effective.
Invest in Your Mental Health
Once you have gone through a toxic relationship, it is a good idea to talk to a professional therapist. They will be able to help you work through your trauma in a healthy, beneficial way. Toxic relationships can lead to many serious mental health issues like post-traumatic stress disorder and issues trusting others. A therapist can help you tackle these issues and start the healing process.
Do Not Blame Yourself
You should never blame yourself for the toxic actions of another person. A mental health professional will be able to help you process your experience and see that it is not your fault. Blaming yourself is one of the worst things you can do! While you may never get that acceptance of blame from your toxic ex, you should also never blame yourself for their awful actions.
Do Not Rush The Healing Process
Give yourself time to work through your emotions and process the things that happened in your toxic relationship. It takes a lot of time and energy to truly heal, and all professionals will advise you to take all the time you need. Do not expect to wake up and be completely recovered! You may experience waves of grief ages after the relationship has ended that you will need to work through. Healing takes time!
Don’t Rush New Relationships
Once you get out of your bad relationship, you may want to stay single for a while. Experts do not recommend immediately jumping into a new relationship. You should take a little time for yourself and rediscover who you are and what you want. The right relationship will come along eventually, so don’t try to force one. You do not want to end up in the same toxic situation again!
Volunteer Your Time
Many studies have found that volunteering your time can decrease symptoms of depression and anxiety. This may be just what you need after ending a toxic relationship. Experts recommend finding an organization you admire and volunteering your time to help others. It can be anything, from a non-profit working with the homeless, refugees, or animals. It may be just the sort of confidence boost you need!
Talk to Your Friends
It can be beneficial to talk about your toxic relationship and what happened when you were in it. Talking to your friends about your experience will not only help you process, but it will also help them understand what you went through. Your friends are a fantastic support system, so be sure to include them in your healing journey. Keep in mind that also spending time with your friends without discussing this issue can be helpful.
Talk to Your Family
Your toxic relationship may have impacted your family, too, especially if your ex was part of their lives. They might not have faced the worst of it, but you never know what they experienced. They could have been worried for you, scared about your relationship, or just trying to support you. Talk to your family—they might have valuable insights that can help you move on. At the very least, they are a dependable constant in your life.
Daily Affirmations
Start each day by looking in the mirror and telling yourself something positive. Look yourself in the eyes and say, out loud, that you are a wonderful person, you have value, you are beautiful, and you deserve the best. This practice can have a huge impact on how you feel about yourself and how you enter into the world each day. It may feel a little silly at first, but daily affirmations will give you the confidence you need to move on from your toxic relationship.
Learn Your Lesson
Of course, you are not the one to blame. Yet, understanding what happened and why may be of great help in your next relationship. Do you tend to choose problematic partners as you firmly believe you’ll be able to ‘fix them’? Do you have a hard time ensuring your boundaries are being respected? You are not responsible for whatever happened, yet this could be a good opportunity for growth.
This article was inspired by Psychology Today.
